I had a long, confusing day. It wasn’t bad at all, but it wasn’t how I planned it. I had all my ducks in a row and BAM! I couldn’t carry on and had to rest. I find the hard pauses a must to comply or fuck around and find out kind of deal. I didn’t miss a beat after I felt better and found myself socializing more than normal. I just didn’t get to finish my ” To Do” list I planned.
We napped💝
I did get my green juice prepped for these next few days. I have my beef bone broth brothing in the crockpot overnight. I can enjoy that as my very light lunch for a few days and if this cleanse doesn’t suit me at all I will end it. I’m actually very excited for tomorrow and reflecting during these next few days. I’m ready to cleanse and get things less heavy.
Nourishing my body is the goal this week!
I accept what is, and know I don’t always have control. Nor do I want it. I don’t know how the whole universe works and time and space. I do know how to cope and change my mindset for my health. If one of my rules causes me torment, then I’ll investigate and reassess. I don’t need outside advice, I just need time to reflect. I have begun the initiation of space into my life. Lots of space these next few days. There are lots of things to notice, I’m sure. How far can you go?
I decided to spoil myself with a sunrise surprise show, medicine wheel meditation, a long walk, peaceful yoga practice, and I hung out with my cool, spiritual friends all afternoon laughing and healing. Today was much needed and I feel so full of love. I was able to tend to my garden and pull weeds. I will honor myself every Sunday, all day. A new ritual to add as a “non-negotiable”, meaning I will do this every Sunday.
A huge part of my Sundays is preparing for the week ahead. I plan on starting a fast-mimicking diet. From what I have read from my Ayurveda group I will be consuming 500 – 700 calories a day. This will ensure optimal cleaning of my body as my cells will be entering autophagy. I got the ok from my Dr, so I made my grocery list to get my healing munchies for the week.
I enjoy moving my body and getting outside to enjoy the sweet melodies of the migrated birds. There are birds that sound like dripping water, and I hear some that sound like a kitten meowing. I love witnessing nature with my senses. I found myself soaking up the songs from the trees this morning before the sun rose. I forget how healing it is to be present outside. Fully aware without anyone but me and outside. It’s very grounding and gets me in the right headspace to start my day.
Yoga is my soul’s heartbeat. I miss it after long pauses. I go through seasons making excuses and not making time for it. I never ever regretted a yoga session. I connect my body, mind, and soul. This is so real to me and if I spend a tiny 5 minutes being intentional with my breathing and movements I am revived! The puppet and the puppet master become one mind. I am aware where my body is today, at this moment along with my mind. It’s like a daily checkup for me.
My garden is my joy. I get back what I put in. I tend to the plants, weed, water, prune, de-bug so I can one day harvest and nourish my body. According to Ayurveda, digestion begins when the seed is planted. I planted beets, spinach, kale, sugar snap peas, radishes, lettuce, and onions. I get excited each day to see how much my babies grew.
I love that I have such a community of strong women. I will always treasure my friendships. That’s a huge part of me getting involved in group activities. I never know who I am going to meet and how they will impact my future. So far, I have been on a roll being at the right place, at the right time, with the right people. Women having each other’s back is the hugest tidal wave of energy so be aware of some crazy exciting movement. Nothing will be the same.
“Anything that is not love is only a visitor to your body.”
-Tahlia Hunter inspired by Rumi “This being human is a house guest”.
I would agree that there was too much space from my last post to now. The off time has been filled with lots of learning and getting prepared to frolic in the summer season. I have started my spring detox and with this comes cleaning out my mind. I find meditation to be the most helpful to receive messages from my body. I sync up to my highest self and get first-hand knowledge on how to navigate through the unknown. Everything in this new season is unknown and I have no idea I am about to realize the huge roadblock standing in my way is me.
To step or not to step:
I cannot look at a task for what it is. I feel when I do that it absorbs my attention into the boring monotony of completing it versus what can I learn from this? I just cannot wait to get it done but if I accept what needs to be done, then I can be mindful and present, the time flies, lessons are learned, and I move on with a pocketful of new knowledge. What a concept! Let me tell you, this has been one of the biggest lessons of my life!
I am a naturally lazy person and I enjoy my sloooow mornings but what I want is not what I NEED. The act of being a proactive person is much more than thinking it. Uggghhhh! I tend to plan more than act. Anyone feel me on that? LOL! I want to be a do-er!
This is how mediation and journaling helped me. So, I can get carried away in daydreams. How I want a moment to go, my life, my day, my night routine, etc. I may or may not act on them depending on my mood. I mean, how can I know what works if I don’t try? Well, I begin to journal what thoughts are repetitive. How do these thoughts make me feel? What would happen if I actually manifested this thought into my current life? I will close my eyes and clear my head of all thoughts as much as I can handle. I enjoy the silence, the darkness, the sounds. My breath is my focus until I settle in nothing.
I don’t know exactly how this works, but answers flood my brain. The messages I receive may be too out of my comfort zone. I may be too embarrassed or scared to step out of line. What would people think? I might start to tell myself things I heard other people say about themselves or about me. I might begin to believe the words; the names and I might start to look at myself negatively. But then, a huge part of me says, “What if I’m good at it? What if I am a success? What does success look like?”
It took me years and thousands of dollars in therapy to get to this point in my life. I spent so much time trying so many things to support who I really am. I showed up for everyone but me. I stand tall for my kids, and I will love and support them no matter what. I show up for my family and friends and shower them with all of my attentive love. I will give the shirt off my back to help someone in need. But what will I do for me? I do for everyone but myself and that is my roadblock. My huge pillar standing in my way. ME.
What does showing up for myself look like?
I have decided to be a full-time business entrepreneur. I feel the universe is fully supporting me and I can do what I need to share my drinks with the world. I have never felt so fucking comfortable in such an unfamiliar place. I just keep putting one foot in front of the other and I trust I am on the right path. I have applied to participate in a local pitch competition, and I am scared out of my mind. That is exactly what I need to level up. Fear will keep me focused and I will show up to represent who I am and what I plan to do. This is something I don’t do. Share my future goals with anyone! Holy shit! Let’s go!
I do plan on posting every day for the rest of the year (with lots of grace and love to myself). I will share my thoughts and lessons and maybe these can seed your “mind garden” and get you thinking about you, too! What will it take to level up and get to your next higher self? Oh, I can’t wait!
Self-Diagnosed Yogi 