springreset

Eras Collab

/ Self-Diagnosed Yogi / Leave a comment

Hè, friend!

Another week began, and I decided to vacate the usual hamster wheel routine. Things need to be rearranged to fit my new life aspirations motif. I am manifesting me. New me, improved me, a new eras me. I will embrace this change because it’s a collab of all the past mes at my highest self. I have a collection of personal highs that will encourage me to live as my highest self. I present an eras collab.

Youth me:

I could sit by this little stream and watch the patterns ripple over the tree roots and rocks. There was a comfort in the songs of the birds. I knew this wooded area so well. I spent so much of my childhood here. Alone. I preferred. I never needed anyone here. I was always safe.

There is nothing like an early morning walk to greet the sun. It’s amazing! I also like to workout early. My plan is to move every morning. This daily practice helped me tremendously with my recovery. I know I need it.

Teen me:

I loved to write. I would listen to Lauryn Hill and write poems, stories, and research papers. Lol! I was obsessed with words and meanings. There is a floetry to a love dance or hurt. Being a teen in the 90s was amazing. I had great women to admire and get inspiration.

I plan on getting word creative daily. I’m not sure how that looks, but infesting myself with words is my goal. In and out.

20’s me:

Social butterfly in the house! I was in it all! I miss having the hours long girl time conversing and not having to hold back cause your circle was tight. I could hold the same sacred circle for all my girls. What a huge blessing.

@blushfitness

30’s me:

Lifting weights was unlike any other workout. I was so connected; mind, body. I was able to build muscles and squat heavy. I showed up for myself and surprised myself. I got pretty fit by myself. I can get back to this mindset, no problem.

As vast as this ocean is, I trust the journey.

40’s me:

Acceptance. I never fully understood what this would be like. I enter my 40s facing the unknown. Life after covid, wrinkles, finally facing my alcohol problem, new career turn, spiritual awakening, healing traumas. That’s in 2 years. Life is wild!

I might have this huge plan to slowly introduce my highest eras back into existence, but with my wisdom, I know acceptance for where I am is most needed. Acceptance is my peace and wisdom is my compass.

Namastè!

All pictures by Self-Diagnosed Yogi.

Self-Realization

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Hè, friend!

Spring is really showing out this season. We had wet, rainy days, cold days, blustery windy days, hot, sunny days, and chilly nights. My spring reset is officially fully integrated, and I am excited to see the sights with my fully functional senses. I would agree that April is flying by! I made an intention of posting every day, but I found it wasn’t beneficial to my life. I do want to share every day, but some days I get so busy, I forget. I also find myself in a repeating thought process. It’s where I am sometimes. I found myself in a familiar pattern of not finishing things. I will have big ideas and big plans, but I fall short and completely stop. I then move on to the next thing to partially build.

4/20 plant potting party!

I noticed this huge pattern in my life. A huge hindrance and an elephant in the room I called ‘normal’. Now that I see it, what am I going to do about it, you ask? Well, I am taking big plans into action by building my lemonade business up. I began my week of research and writing and planning. I’m quiet on the internet, but things are manifesting over here! I want to see this out and invest my best in myself. If the business fails, I will take what I need and build it better the next time. If I thrive, I will share my knowledge as seeds for the next person. I am not a gatekeeper, I share. Knowledge is power, and I feel it in my soul that I am on the right path no matter the outcome.

Whatever I say now are my plans will change. I will change as a person as my business grows. This is the natural progression in life. I know what it feels like to be wanting more and have no idea how to get there. I just left an outgrown garden bed and found one with companion plants that will ensure my survival and show me how to thrive. One day, I will need to change out of this garden bed but for now, it’s home. My roots are getting stronger as I learn to navigate through these unknown times. My feet will not fail me now.

Namastè!

All pictures by Self-Diagnosed Yogi.

Manifestor

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Hè, friend!

It’s been pretty quiet over here. I have been taking some time out to decompress and reset. I am ready to resume my path, and I am contemplating how my mornings will look beginning next week. I have new focus and direction to entertain me while the kinks of my life work themselves out. I will finish what I started and noticed I’m falling back into a pattern of a bunch of half-finished shit. Ew. I want to manifest myself as a finisher and even better as a successful businesswoman. I have saved millions for big corporations, and now it’s time for me to use my power for me. I will determine my successes, and this will be such an amazing time to learn and make money while learning on the job.

What is a manifestor?

A do-er. The seer from manifesto to end-O. Me. Hi, I am a manifestor of my life dreams and I turn them into reality. I know what things make me sing and I know what the beat of my heart longs for. I am excellent at solving my own problems and keeping moving forward. My dreams become tangible, and I keep manifesting my dreams.

Make a detailed list.

How can I know what I really want if I don’t write it down? I get excited seeing new monthly goals typed out. It makes them real. I mean, how can I talk about my future plans with my future customers if I’m not planning? Duh! I love planning, it’s acting on those plans that’s my downfall. I find myself in too many rooms and not finished painting one of them. I think this might be mindless sabotage pattern that I need to break. I see how this sneaky little, big, huge problem snaked its way into my sober life. I quit alcohol so this is nothing. Here goes nothing.

Do I need to break a pattern?

First of all, I will need to be the one to recognize it. Then, I have to agree to change its form. I find value in boundaries and making sure I trust where I am. Do I need armor? Do I need my defenses up? I like to fully understand where I am in my feelings. How do I feel? That is a multiple, daily question. For real. Next, is the breakthrough question if there is value in change. Sometimes awareness plants a seed and eventually a new thought pattern can grow from that. It just takes time to see where growth takes place. Growth isn’t necessarily lowering the gates, just awareness.

Small wins!

I will celebrate every day. There is a lot that goes into my human day of life. I take for granted waking up. I mean, that is a huge blessing! I have a lot of classmates that didn’t make it to my age so prayers up! I know success because my whole life has been just that. I know I cannot lose when my mind is 100% in the game and I really believe I am on the right, successful path that I am supposed to be on.

Namastè!

All pictures by Self Diagnosed Yogi.

Fear What?

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Hè, friend!

How has the weekend been treating you? Yesterday was beautiful and hot! I was able to spend some time catching up on some business ends and met up with my dear friend. We talked nonstop for 5 hours. Oh, I needed that! Girl time. We went to a pow wow, and I was looking for new earrings and a ribbon skirt but left empty-handed somehow.

Today, I decided to get on a reading schedule. My plan is to educate myself by reading more non-fiction books. I’m starting with “The Emerald Tablet of Hermes” by Hermes Trismegistus. I am a truth seeker. I think the very seed was planted when I decided that. I have been watching this seed bloom and begin my spiritual awakening in 2020.

A spiritual awakening is when the NPC (non playable character) decides one day to do something different. I stepped out of line and decided to go outside the drawn line. I began to question a lot. I decided I would unlearn and reset seeking only the truth. Then,  Ayurveda came. I have never felt so supported by something I only just found out about. I wanted it applied to all of my life, but I had no idea how. Well, boom!! Here comes my local yoga studio offering teachings.

Life is amazing when you are really present. Think about when you really wanted something. Did you get it? I do. If I don’t get it, then it wasn’t mine. I understand this. It’s very new, but as soon as I started looking at my life at a 30,000-foot view, I saw. I am just now dipping my toes in the fear pool. I know the only way for me to level up is that I need to do something big. Out of comfort. I will be ok and learn a lot on this new venture.

My safety spot is closing in on me cause I’m getting too big. My ideas need more space and more experience. Even if I fail, I will learn. I just need to keep moving. I hope to see you at the finish line as we conquer these fears.

Namastè!

All pictures by Lenape Spiritual Yogi Awakened.

Pep to My Step

/ Self-Diagnosed Yogi / 2 Comments

Hello!

Happy Friday! I can’t believe I made it! This week has been insane and somehow I’m here! All I want to do is rest and pamper myself. I feel a pedicure and massage coming. Oh, joy! What are your weekend plans?

My weekend will be full of my best girlfriends and I sharing conversations and lots of laughter. I miss my friends so much! I don’t know about you, but there is a certain energy with uplifting women. I get recharged so I can continue sharing my gifts. I get to say out loud my goals and not be discouraged by upstaging. We are on our own journeys, but damn, magic happens with my girls. I love them💞

I’m ending my cleanse after today. I seriously will continue the light, early dinner because that wake-up call is early, and I like this new pep to my step. It’s nice and light and full of energy! “Snap your fingers, do your step,” Lil John.

I don’t have many pictures to share, but I will tomorrow! This week was about survival, and well, now it’s time to party 🥳

Namastè!

Lessons of Unpacking My Sh*t

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Hè!

I had a great sleep last night and woke up full of energy and light on my feet. That is really odd considering I ate way less than I have, ever in my days. Unless I was sick. I am feeling pretty good today. It’s only 5am but who am I to block this productivity? I guess a fast-mimicking cleanse brings good medicine for me. I only have 2 more days to go. I feel the natural flow of cleansing to be rhythmic as it invades my body, space, and mind. Today I will share the lessons of unpacking my shit.

Lesson #1: Clean, Tidy Spaces

We have been upgrading our carpet and with new changes we have to get into the deep corners that are not touched to clean house. This has been wonderful to get rid of things in our bedroom. I have so much space and do not plan on putting something else in its place. It will just be an empty space now. Beautiful and purposeful. I want my bedroom to be a decompression tank for me and my husband. No piles of junk and extra stuff with no home to share my space with. Everything has a home and if it does not. Do I need it? Stay tuned on our upgrades sometime this summer.

Lesson #2: Light Dinner

I am not one to know what a “light” dinner is before Ayurveda came into my life. It took me even a few years after to fully understand what a light dinner does for me. Even cutting a regular meal in half is considered lighter. I am waking up feeling light and energized even more. I feel my body wringing out from all the processed foods and gunk I have exposed myself to. This is exhilarating to say the least! This is my only body and I have goals to live a long time and hug my family.

Lesson #3: Adequate Sleep

For me, I need to be in bed by 9:30 PM. No exceptions! If I want to wake refreshed and full of purpose, then bedtime is important. I spent many, many nights up at 11pm. Shoot, we used to eat dinner around 8 pm! That is crazy to me now! LOL! Me and my husband agree, going to bed early and waking early is a huge part of who we have become. I love getting older with this man! We sync up as we age. I can suggest a good, solid night routine. What are 3 things you absolutely love to do to care for you? I start with a decompressing bath with candles and an amazing book. The warm ambiance sets the tone. I oil myself up with my herby potions and get me a hot nightcap drink going. I will settle in bed with my journal and/or book in my peaceful space.

Lesson #4: Connecting Mind, Body, Soul

I am a sucker for yoga! It gets my mind off its usual role of survival, and I can connect my mind to my body and breath. Seriously, how often do you consider your breath? Do you notice how fast it can be when you are stressed? It’s not fully expressional and short. Imagine breathing like that all the time. You don’t use it, you lose it. I notice as my loved one’s ages their breath becomes shallower. I practice my full yogic breathing daily. That is a deep loving inhale in three parts: chest, diaphragm, and belly. It is a practice and accepting where we are with it now is love. Love yourself and keep going! Whatever the flavor, being mindful to moving the body daily is key to a healthy mindset.

Lesson #5: Community

There are people just like me, that are curious with change. I am attracting people to me just by being me. I love to engage with people and share stories. There are so many groups I become a part of and I am gifted new friendships. I am always busy but most of my time is spent alone. I am changing this and getting involved daily. If I have extra time, I will volunteer and get my face out in public. I notice a lot of the same faces in my community activities. I love being with people and being around the right people is healing for me.

Yogi Outro:

I am finding my space to be less confusing and more welcoming. I have thinned out my bookshelf even and donated some good reads. I love this season because it forces me to look at things I have neglected. Spring cleaning is epic! Last year, in my garden, I didn’t take the time to properly add nutrients back into the soil. My garden paid for my decision and I had a small harvest because of it. Lesson learned! I am just like my garden. If I take my time before growing season to ensure my body is detoxed and ready for work, then I will be MVP. I will be unstoppable with hitting my goals!

Namastè!

Human Connections

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Hè, friend!

I want you to know that I appreciate you showing up to read my blog. I never know what I am going to blog about and write until something catches. I go through a lot of life each day and just realized how lonely I am. I never would have thought that I could be feeling this way, but here I am. I have lots of connections, but I may not be connecting as much as I need. This is great information for me because this is something I can work on now!

Over the weekend I went alone to a Pysanky class. I made so many connections just laughing at our waxing skills.

My friends are my world! We can go long stretches and when we connect, hours of laughing and catching up! I missed a few friend catch ups this week due to unfortunate gifts from the universe but in all actuality, they may be considered blessings because I have found a huge hinderance in my life and a solution all in one day. I must be a wizard, but I will really find out if I can get through this crazy week in one piece!

One thing me and my friends like to do is catch up over food! We will order 10 things from the menu and fill up our table and get a taste of the many dishes in front of us. You can catch us walking around downtown, taking in the sights and music. Dancing is always fun too! I haven’t gone out dancing in a long time since my bedtime has been quite early lately. I can not turn down a good girl date, though.

I have a friend filled weekend planned and I cannot wait! My human connections keep me sane. I can connect with someone who knows and cares about me. Plus, being around other women is very connecting because we are on the same level. Survival. Navigators of life. We are a strong, lively bunch and very much managers of our teams. I just love my friends and I love making new ones too.

Let’s let this week bring us bountiful blessings of human connections! I know we are halfway through these 7 days but that gives us a few more days to get flowing in conversations. How many friends do you call or video chat with monthly? Do you prefer in face connections or online? Are you the advice giver or advice taker? Let’s get talking 🙂

Namaste!

All pictures by Lenape Spiritual Yogi Awakened.

Overcomer

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Hè!

I have been on a wild roller coaster of a day! I just kept moving forward and accepting what is. I plan on meditating tonight just to find my mind. Today proves how little control I have over my life. I can not make my body accept anything it doesn’t want to. I can’t force insurance companies to pay what they say they will pay. I certainly can not speed up slow traffic that takes 1.5 hours to travel 20 miles. My evening will be sitting with these new complications and figuring out the best strategy to overcome cause I am an overcomer.

My strong pose, Warrior I💝

I will tend to my night routine after I write this. That will consist of an Epsom bath with an epic CBD rub down. I plan on resting in bed with a good book and will be asleep by 9:30. This is the plan, and however, this pans out is out of my scope. My loving intention is there.

I am hoping to share this not as a negative but as something that is a hindrance for my plans. Maybe my plans weren’t good enough anyway? Maybe it’s Mercury in retrograde or after effects of the solar eclipse? I’m wondering if anyone else has had a crazy few days? Well, I hope tomorrow has its act right. I can only hope, and if not, I know how to tend to my wounds.

Namastè!

All pictures by Lenape Spiritual Yogi Awakened.

Roadblocks

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Hello!

“Anything that is not love is only a visitor to your body.”

-Tahlia Hunter inspired by Rumi “This being human is a house guest”.

I would agree that there was too much space from my last post to now. The off time has been filled with lots of learning and getting prepared to frolic in the summer season. I have started my spring detox and with this comes cleaning out my mind. I find meditation to be the most helpful to receive messages from my body. I sync up to my highest self and get first-hand knowledge on how to navigate through the unknown. Everything in this new season is unknown and I have no idea I am about to realize the huge roadblock standing in my way is me.

To step or not to step:

I cannot look at a task for what it is. I feel when I do that it absorbs my attention into the boring monotony of completing it versus what can I learn from this? I just cannot wait to get it done but if I accept what needs to be done, then I can be mindful and present, the time flies, lessons are learned, and I move on with a pocketful of new knowledge. What a concept! Let me tell you, this has been one of the biggest lessons of my life!

I am a naturally lazy person and I enjoy my sloooow mornings but what I want is not what I NEED. The act of being a proactive person is much more than thinking it. Uggghhhh! I tend to plan more than act. Anyone feel me on that? LOL! I want to be a do-er!

This is how mediation and journaling helped me. So, I can get carried away in daydreams. How I want a moment to go, my life, my day, my night routine, etc. I may or may not act on them depending on my mood. I mean, how can I know what works if I don’t try? Well, I begin to journal what thoughts are repetitive. How do these thoughts make me feel? What would happen if I actually manifested this thought into my current life? I will close my eyes and clear my head of all thoughts as much as I can handle. I enjoy the silence, the darkness, the sounds. My breath is my focus until I settle in nothing.

I don’t know exactly how this works, but answers flood my brain. The messages I receive may be too out of my comfort zone. I may be too embarrassed or scared to step out of line. What would people think? I might start to tell myself things I heard other people say about themselves or about me. I might begin to believe the words; the names and I might start to look at myself negatively. But then, a huge part of me says, “What if I’m good at it? What if I am a success? What does success look like?”

It took me years and thousands of dollars in therapy to get to this point in my life. I spent so much time trying so many things to support who I really am. I showed up for everyone but me. I stand tall for my kids, and I will love and support them no matter what. I show up for my family and friends and shower them with all of my attentive love. I will give the shirt off my back to help someone in need. But what will I do for me? I do for everyone but myself and that is my roadblock. My huge pillar standing in my way. ME.

What does showing up for myself look like?

I have decided to be a full-time business entrepreneur. I feel the universe is fully supporting me and I can do what I need to share my drinks with the world. I have never felt so fucking comfortable in such an unfamiliar place. I just keep putting one foot in front of the other and I trust I am on the right path. I have applied to participate in a local pitch competition, and I am scared out of my mind. That is exactly what I need to level up. Fear will keep me focused and I will show up to represent who I am and what I plan to do. This is something I don’t do. Share my future goals with anyone! Holy shit! Let’s go!

I do plan on posting every day for the rest of the year (with lots of grace and love to myself). I will share my thoughts and lessons and maybe these can seed your “mind garden” and get you thinking about you, too! What will it take to level up and get to your next higher self? Oh, I can’t wait!

Namaste!